sLesTa [dot] com

>> PRICELESS

2008-07-21T21:43:00.001+07:00

ah, gak kerasa udah sebulan gue gak update2 blog gue lagi. padahal kemaren2 ini udah mulai aktif dan regularly update yah.. tapi pas gue udah masuk kantor.. langsung mendadak dicuekin lagi deh blog nya. hehhe...

as i figured, being a super mom is H-A-R-D. dari urusan sedih karena mesti ninggalin anak gue di rumah, urusan siap2 di pagi hari, makin kurang tidur (karena obviously, siang2 gue ga bisa istirahat ato bobo siang), capek mulu bawaannya, kangen ama anak gue kalo pas lagi di kantor yang kadang bikin gue ga konsen ama kerjaan, belom lagi kalo udah kejar2an mesti pulang karena udah jam-nya anak gue mesti dimandiin (gue masih mandiin dia pagi & sore) tapi gue masih stuck in the meeting. ribetnyaaa minta ampun... takut banget yang dia jadi rewel trus jadi moody gitu. mungkin kalo sekarang2 dia masih belom ngerasa kayak 'dicuekin' ama ibu bapaknya karena kita sibuk di kantor, karena ya naia masih kecil banget. but soon, gue takut banget yang dia ngerasa kalo ibu & bapaknya gak pernah ada buat nemenin dia maen di siang hari karena mesti ngantor. ya gue rasa sih ini sebenernya problem semua orang yang kerja yah?? toh gue bukan orang pertama yang mesti ngantor all day dan punya anak di rumah. tentunya gue tetep berusaha dong.. gimana pun caranya. memberi pengertian walopun kita kerja dan ga di rumah, tapi bukan berarti gak merhatiin anak, ya kan?

minggu lalu aja, gue udah sempet pulang kantor after midnite. midnite, you ask? yep, after midnite!!! gara2 ada report yang due untuk di submit hari itu juga dan last minute gue find out kalo ada problems di reportnya yang mesti di fix dulu. thousands of lines of mistakes!! jadilah setelah gue pulang buat mandiin naia & nidurin dia, gue balik lagi ke kantor, ngeberesin report2nya.. trus baru balik ke rumah. sampe rumah, beberes ini itu... gue siap2 tidur, baruuu aja tidur ga sampe stengah jam... eeh, anak gue dah bangun buat feeding tengah malamnya. doh!! and by 6 AM, gue udah siap2 lagi ngantor, buru2 mandi sebelom anak gue bangun and so on and so forth... dan ended up kayak zombie all day at work. kalo udah gini, gue bener2 appreciate ibu gue banget deh. she may not be a working mom as she has always been a full-time housewife. but i bet the hardship of being a mom is just the same.

and no matter how much i complain and how tired i am everyday .. at the end of the day, it all goes away when i see a beautiful smile from my baby's face when i go back home from work every night!

it's just priceless!!

:: sLesTa

>> WONDER WOMAN

2008-06-17T07:20:00.001+07:00

it's been two and a half months since i gave birth to a beautiful daughter. i spent time to take care of her myself and see her grows up day by day. lack of sleep, baby poo, cries in the middle of the night, early rise, breastfeeding horror.. it's all part of my initiation to motherhood. and i was surprisingly happy to do it all, just to get a glimpse of smiles and cuteness out of my baby girl.

i'm never bored to see her face while she's asleep. never felt the tiresome even though she's cranky all day. i just never want to let myself away from her.

and since i'm a working mother, my maternity leave is almost up. i intend to spend it as much as i can with her. unfortunately, i'm facing a dilemma that i think most working mother probably has. should i go back to work or stay home to take care of my kid?

well, the latter was never an option for me. i know from the beginning that i would still work after my baby is born. i am determined that i can be a working mother and still be a good mom. i'm not a wonder woman but i know many women have done it, so why can't i? the least i can do is try.

so when my boss called me right after my baby celebrated her second-month birthday, i was in shocked to find out that she wanted me to cut short my maternity leave because she has tendered her resignation and needed to hand over some of the work to me. in the meantime, i don't think myself and my baby is ready to be apart yet. although i have prepared that this day will come, i didn't think that it will come that early!

so i started to train her by letting other people to take care of her, so she won't be too dependent on me. i told my boss that i needed time to prepare myself and my baby to be away from each other during the day. not to mention i need to find someone who will take care of my baby while i'm at work.

this week, i have found out that my maid, who's been working with my mom for a long time, has passed her english test to be eligible to work in singapore. so that means, she can start work for me and take care of my daughter. as much as i'm happy that i have found a trustworthy person to take care of my daughter, i'm also sad that it means, i have to go back to work before this week ends.. as my boss' last day is by end of this week.

would i be able to be the 'wonder woman' and manage to take care of my daughter as well as my career? i hope so.. if a lot of women can, why can't i? right?

:: sLesTa

>> LOOK ALIKE ??

2008-05-23T14:10:00.002+07:00

the left side is a picture of me when i was (maybe) about 6 months old. that's the only baby picture of myself that i've scanned a while ago.

the right side is a picture of my baby daughter, naia, at about 6 weeks old, the day her head was shaved.

what do you think? do we look alike? :)

:: sLesTa

>> WHOA, BALD BABY!!

2008-05-19T02:01:00.002+07:00

after naia's scheduled visit to the doctor for her vaccination on saturday, we took her to orchard road then to vivo city & harborfront centre. she was a good girl and behaved nicely the whole time. on the way to the new mothercare store in harborfront centre, we passed by a baby salon and i inquired about shaving her head. hubby and i have been debating about shaving her hair, in which he prefers to shave her after she's at least one year old. while on the other hand, i want to shave her baby hair soon so she can grow her hair sooner too.

i won the debate and we went in to the store to have hair head shaved. she was crying the whole time. cried her lungs out. but then right after, she was tired and fell asleep on my arms, looking cuter and bald! by the time we got home, she has forgotten the whole shaving episode and posed for us with her bald head. she definitely loooveees the camera!

:: sLesTa

>> NEW BOOTIES!!

2008-05-16T20:21:00.003+07:00

yesterday, a package came for my baby daughter. a long-awaited package cuz this was supposed to be a surprise from my dear friends, irma & adis. unfortunately, they sent it to the old apartment so it got lost along the way. after i called the shipping company, they finally delivered it.

inside the package, there were a green handpainted bamboo box containing a blankie, a pair of booties (they are sooo cuuuteee!!!), hello kitty hair clips and rubber froggie... they are so cute and are handmade by those dear friends of mine.

the package is also part of the stuff they are selling in the newly-launched online store junk n' joy.

soon that afternoon, i put on the cute booties on naia... and they are just sooo perfect on her little feet!! so cute!!

thank you, tante irma & tante adis!! luv you both! *big hugs*

:: sLesTa

>> 40 DAYS

2008-05-12T16:05:00.004+07:00

yesterday, my baby daughter celebrated her 40-days birthday.

according to many tradition, 40 days old is believed to be the time when the baby is pretty much well aware of their surroundings and old enough to go out of the house. even the mom should be fit enough to carry on their activities outside of the house. in islam, 40 days also marks the end of "nifas" period.

so what have my baby daughter done in her 40 days existence on earth?

... she has grown quite significantly, though not too much since she's dependent on breastmilk (which don't put on weight as fast as if she was feeding formula!). on her 1 month bday, she was already put on 500gr from her birth weight.

... since she was a tiny baby, most of her clothes didn't fit her when she was born. now, they have.

... she has outgrown her wrapped period and was able to sleep without her wrap. though i still put it on at night cuz she wakes up a lot if not wrapped. apparently, she still has no control of her hands, so most of the times she would wake up because her hands accidentally hit her head.

... though she still cries when she wakes up, she has her "fun" moments when she stays quiet and don't ask for milk, though she will after a while. but when she doesn't, she can make goo-goo-gah-gah noise and play with us and throws smiles and laughter.

... she can play by herself and more aware of her surroundings. so aware that she knows when i left the room, usually resulting her waking up and cries her lungs out till i come back.

... she had 2 trips to the doctor and 1 trip to changi airport.

... she had seen orchard street and hang out near tangs department store (though she was sleeping the entire time)

... she had visited marine parkway and let us eat at a restaurant while she was fast asleep in her stroller

... she had gone to the immigration office to apply for her PR status

... she had her first trip abroad, visiting her uncle in kualalumpur, malaysia on her 40th day. she enjoys being in the car seat and slept the entire time. she only woke up when we stopped at the rest area for feeding or changing.

i can't wait till she can start play by herself without crying for milk :D

:: sLesTa

>> MY DAYS NOW

2008-04-24T12:17:00.004+07:00

for the past three weeks, my days now revolve only around naia, breastfeeding, poop, diapers, cries in the middle of the night and throughout the day.

naia was an angel for the first two weeks. all she did was sleep. she was sleeping all the time that it took effort just to wake her up. unfortunately those days had passed. these days, she's very sensitive to sound. that's why she would cry throughout the day cuz the smallest sound from outside would wake her up. and that means she would not be sleeping almost the entire morning. though it's a good arrangement cuz by night she would be sound asleep except during her feeding time, unfortunately, it left me with little time to do during the day cuz i have to attend to her.

breastfeeding is also not as easy as i thought. it's really painful, especially if you have sore nipples.. not to mention sometimes i wonder if my baby get enough milk cuz she always wakes up and asks for more milk even after i just had fed her.

it may be growth spurts. cuz she's definitely growing and getting bigger. as for myself, i'm trying as much as i can to get used to all of this. i think i managed fine... as my world is no longer revolves around email, phone calls, numbers and analysis... it's all about baby poop and lactation *sigh*.

:: sLesTa

>> DELIVERING NAIA

2008-04-16T09:56:00.003+07:00

introducing my newborn baby naia, who was born on april 1st. she was delivered normally in a quiet fast delivery process. here's the detail of her delivery..

monday, march 31 2008
walopun officially gue udah cuti melahirkan dari minggu lalu, tapi sampe jumat kemaren gue masih ngantor. hari ini gue udah bener2 gak ngantor lagi dan udah fokus untuk lahiran. hari sabtu kemaren gue ke dokter, semuanya dalam kondisi bagus, tapi belom ada tanda2 gue akan melahirkan soon. jadi kalo kata dokternya ya kemungkinan bakal on time. hari ini gue ama bonyok gue pergi ke apt baru gue buat bebersih dan beres2. the whole weekend gue udah di cekokin kata2 "ayo banyak jalan, biar gampang lahirannya" sampe gue bete sendiri. abisan sebanyak2nya gue jalan juga kan tetep aja gue mesti banyak istirahat juga. udah cepet capek gitu loh. anyway, hari ini di apt baru gue ngebantuin beberes, sama nyokap disuruh ngangkat2 belanjaan. trus gue ikutan ngebersihin kaca dan ngepel dari ujung ke ujung. asli itu capek banget!! rencananya besok kita mau packing barang2 gue yang di apt lama dan hari rabu nya, movers akan mindahin barang2 dari apt lama ke apt baru.

tuesday, april 1, 2008 @ 01.00AM
gue bangun dari tempat tidur buat pipis ke kamar mandi. pas pipis sih ga papa. tapi pas gue balik ke tempat tidur, gue ngerasa kok ada yang ga enak yah.. jadi gue balik lagi ke toilet dan menemukan darah di undies gue. darah warna coklat tua, not fresh red blood. dengan santainya gue cuma nyamperin nyokap di kamarnya dan nanya, itu artinya apa? berhubung gue belom ngerasa kontraksi, akhirnya gue balik tidur. i assume the spotting caused by the ruptured of the membrane of the cervix. gue langsung baca2 bible gue "what to expect when you're expecting" dan katanya it could take 24-48 hours dari spotting itu. jadi ya udah gue balik tidur dan mikir.. masih sempet pindahan dulu kayaknya. :P

04.30AM
gue mulai ngerasa kontraksi. gue itungin jaraknya, masih within 30-45 minutes. gue masih rada2 gak konsen ngitungnya, yang pasti jaraknya masih lama. jadi gue masih nyantai2 aja. gak ngebangunin suami gue juga.

06.00AM
kontraksinya udah makin deket, kira2 20 minutes apart. suami gue udah langsung panik dan bilang ya udah langsung ke rumah sakit aja. gue bilang, ntar dulu aja, kalo kontraksinya udah 5-10 min apart. akhirnya suami gue yang emang panikan malah ga bisa balik tidur dan malah bangun buat nyiapin hospital bag gue. hihi... soalnya sampe saat itu, gue masih belom bersiap2 hospital bag nya. baru barang2 yang mau dibawa gue pisah2in, tapi belom gue pack.

07.00AM
kontraksi gue udah mulai 10 min apart. kita udah siap2 mau ke rumah sakit, tapi sempet2nya gue online dulu trus email2an sambil nungguin nyokap & suami gue mandi dulu.

07.30AM
we're on the road on our way to the hospital.

08.00AM
sampe di rumah sakit, ngasih dokumen2 untuk admission trus diajak ke delivery room untuk di cek ini itu. trus gue dipasangin drip untuk induce the delivery process biar cepet. masalahnya pas dipasangin drip itu, nurse nya gak bisa nemuin vein gue yang emang kecil banget.. jadinya tangan kiri gue bengkak. trus dipindahin ke tangan kanan dan di pakein jarum yang keciiill banget, biar muat! abis itu gue mulai ngerasain kontraksi yang makin deket. 1-2 minutes apart. awalnya gue sih masih ok2 aja. masih kekeuh gak mau pake apa2 buat deliverynya. pas gue tanya ke susternya gue udah bukaan berapa.. taunya masih bukaan 2cm. oh well, ternyata long way to go.

11.00AM
kontraksi gue udah makin sering.. udah tiap menit kali, pokoknya udah sakit banget. gue udah mulai gak kuat. susternya udah 2x bolak balik nanya gue mau pake apa? gas, injection ato epidural. gue bilang, gue masih undecided. akhirnya kira2 jam 12-an, bukaan gue masih 3cm, gue udah ga kuat dan minta epidural. within 20 minutes, dokternya dateng dan nyuntikin epidural. gile, untung di punggung disuntiknya jadi gue ga bisa liat.. pas gue ngebalik ngeliat syringe nya.. gedee banget bookk!!! tapi abis itu gue jadi seneng, bisa tidur karena gue ngantuk bangeeett!! heheh..

dokter gue juga sempet dateng ngecek dan bilang kalo bukaan gue masih 3cm, jadi most likely gue baru lahiran jam 5-an sore. he'll be back by 4PM. suami gue juga akhirnya gue suruh pergi nyari makan siang dan nganter bokap gue pulang ke rumah, soalnya ternyata mereka gak bisa ikutan masuk, jadi daripada bete, mendingan pulang dulu aja. nyokap tetep stay di luar delivery room.

2.00PM
a nurse came by to my room. trus dia mulai panik karena ternyata my baby is stressing out inside, heartbeat nya mulai slowing down jadi gue langsung dipasang oxygen mask. at this time, more nurses came in dan mulai sibuk ama urusan ini itu di sekitar gue. gue yang tadinya lagi nyantai2 aja, jadi ikutan panik. duh.. ada apa ini? tapi abis dipakein oxygen mask, my baby's heartbeat mulai back to normal. a nurse checked my dilation, ternyata gue udah bukaan 9.5cm!!! gile, cepet banget! jadilah gue minta supaya suami gue ditelpon, trus dokter gue juga udah ditelpon supaya dateng early.

2.30PM
both my doctor & my hubby came at the same time. langsung gue liat suster2 di sekitar gue preparing all the tools for delivery. two nurses beside me coached me to do the pushing, while the doctor wait for the baby to come out. karena gue pake epidural, gue gak bisa ngerasain kontraksinya banget2.. jadi mesti di coached on when to push. my first push was good but not enough. then it followed by 2 more pushes...

2.50PM
aleyza naiaraputri kusumo was born. suami gue langsung sibuk foto2 & bacain qomat, sementara gue yang lemes berat dan lagi nunggu dokter gue ngejahit miss 'v' gue yang digunting. after baby naia was cleaned up, she was put in front of me for early initiation process and begin the breastfeeding right there in the delivery room.

setelah selese nyusuin (walopun asi gue belom keluar sebenernya) both me & naia were moved to the maternity ward.

yang pasti, proses lahiran gue tuh cepet banget. jadi mau sedetail apa pun gue ceritain kayaknya emang gak banyak, karena ya itu.. semuanya happens very very fast, alhamdulillah banget! dokter gue aja ampe bingung... harusnya balik jam 4, tapi jam 2 dia udah ditelpon karena bukaan gue within an hour udah sampe 9.5cm dari 3cm.

it's a blessing allright. it's even more a bless that my baby is such an angel... gak rewel dan kerjanya tiduuurr mulu. yang kalo kata nyokap gue, mirip banget kayak waktu gue bayi dulu.. kerjanya cuma tiduuuurrrr aja.

she is definitely our little bundle of joy.

:: sLesTa

>> FULL TERM

2008-03-24T10:44:00.002+07:00

i'm entering my 38th week of pregnancy this week. officially, i have taken my maternity leave starting today, though i might still have to come to work in between my free time, if i still can.

the little one might decide to pop out anytime soon. and between now and then, i can't wait to see her and hold her in my arms. till then, i'm taking the time off from the blog world. i'll be around from time to time, but this blog may not be updated too much. but i promise that i'll definitely post the baby's picture once she's born.

* pics taken on my 36th week of pregnancy

regards,
:: sLesTa

>> DID I MARRY THE RIGHT PERSON?

2008-03-15T09:16:00.003+07:00

don't be surprise at the title! no, i'm not questioning myself already... hahah! but i got this article on the email sent from my friend that i thought was really good. you may have read it somewhere before, but either way, i'd like to share it. definitely an eye-opener! those who are still single may learn something from it, and for those who are already married may take it as a guideline to improve your marriage. whatever it is, definitely worth reading. enjoy!

a woman asked a common question. she said, "how do i know if i married the right person?". i noticed that there was a large man sitting next to her so i said, "it depends. is that your husband?" in all seriousness, she answered "how do you know?"

let me answer this question because the chances are good that it's weighing on your mind. here's the answer.

EVERY relationship has a cycle.

in the beginning, you fell in love with your spouse. you anticipated their call, wanted their touch, and liked their idiosyncrasies. falling in love with your spouse wasn't hard. in fact, it was a completely natural and spontaneous experience. you didn't have to DO anything.

that's why it's called "falling" in love... because it's happening TO YOU.

people in love sometimes say, "i was swept of my feet." think about the imagery of that expression. it implies that you were just standing there; doing nothing, and then something came along and happened TO YOU. falling is love is easy. it's a passive and spontaneous experience. but after a few years of marriage, the euphoria of love fades.

it's the natural cycle of EVERY relationship.

slowly but surely, phone calls become a bother (if they come at all), touch is not always welcome (when it happens), and your spouse's idiosyncrasies, instead of being cute, drive you nuts.

the symptoms of this stage vary with every relationship, but if you think about your marriage, you will notice a dramatic difference between the initial stage when you were in love and a much duller or even angry subsequent stage.

at this point, you and/or your spouse might start asking, "did I marry the right person?"

and as you and your spouse reflect on the euphoria of the love you once had, you may begin to desire that experience with someone else. this is when marriages breakdown. people blame their spouse for their unhappiness and look outside their marriage for fulfillment.

extramarital fulfillment comes in all shapes and sizes. infidelity is the most obvious. but sometimes people turn to work, a hobby, a friendship, excessive TV, or abusive substances.

but the answer to this dilemma does NOT lie outside your marriage. it lies within it. i'm not saying that you couldn't fall in love with someone else. you could. and TEMPORARILY you'd feel better. but you'd be in the same situation a few years later. because (listen carefully to this):

the key to succeeding in marriage is not finding the right person; it's learning to love the person you found. sustaining love is not a passive or spontaneous experience. it'll NEVER just happen to you.

you can't "find" LASTING love. you have to "make" it day in and day out. that's why we have the expression "the labor of love." because it takes time, effort, and energy. and most importantly, it takes WISDOM. you have to know WHAT TO DO to make your marriage work.

make no mistake about it.

love is NOT a mystery. there are specific things you can do (with or without your spouse) to succeed with your marriage. just as there are physical laws of the universe (such as gravity), there are also laws for relationships. just as the right diet and exercise program makes you physically stronger, certain habits in your relationship WILL make your marriage stronger. it's a direct cause and effect.

if you know and apply the laws, the results are predictable. ..you can "make" love.
love in marriage is indeed a "decision"... not just a feeling.

:: sLesTa

>> WHO'S WEIRDER? :P

2008-03-01T18:20:00.003+07:00

gak kerasa, pernikahan gue udah masuk 9 bulan tepat di awal bulan ini. tiap hari kita berdua makin saling tau kebiasaan masing2. walopun masa2 pacaran kami dihabiskan dengan long distance, we spent more or less 2 years before we finally say "i do". selama masa pacaran, gue ngerasa kalo emang dia yang paling pas buat gue. walopun banyak hal dari dia yang kadang2 suka bikin orang bingung. tapi buat gue itu adalah part of him yang gak bisa dipisahkan dari dia and i take it as for whoever he is.

one thing i know since we got married and moved far away from our family & friends.. there's no dull moment with him. he always cheers me up, makes me laugh with all his weird & stupid comments, including all his behaviour yang kadang2 suka out of the ordinary.

sejak jauh dari tanah air, kehidupan kami hanya berkisar dengan rutinitas berangkat ke kantor di pagi hari & repot2nya ngurusin rumah & chores ketika pulang ke rumah setelah pulang kantor. weekend juga more or less monoton. nothing to do for us, except for movies, dining out, and window shopping at the mall (obviously, there no shortage of it here!). and these days, our days are exciting because of my pregnancy.

tapi walopun kita tiap hari bertemu dan mengerjakan hal2 yang rutin, rasa bosan jarang datang and he never fail to make me laugh every day. mungkin juga karena sang suami penuh dengan kebawelan dan suka mengeluarkan celetuk2an yang bikin gue jadi ketawa lebar setelah ngomel2. just like the conversation we had below, after he's done something so particularly extra-ordinary (yet stupid sometimes.. heheh.. )

me: duh kamu tuh kok jadi orang aneh banget sih... ??
him: ya tetep... seaneh2nya aku, masih anehan kamu lah, sayaaang..
me: kok gitu?
him: ya lagian.. udah tau aku aneh, masih dikawinin juga. jadi sapa hayoo yang lebih aneh? kamu kan?!

... then he walks away, cekikikan. doh!!

:: sLesTa

>> (NOT) HOME ALONE

2008-02-26T22:59:00.003+07:00

since i got married, hubby and i never really spent our days apart, except during the first week after we're back from our honeymoon, cuz he had to be at work in singapore and i had still one more week to finish my service with my office in indonesia branch. since 80% of our time during pacaran was spent in a long distance, that first week was not an issue at all.

but after i moved to singapore, we pretty much spend all of our time together, unless when we're at work. so, when one day my hubby came home with the news that he had to go for a business trip for two weeks straight really made me sad. honestly, it wasn't at all because we'll be apart or anything. but mostly because i was already on my 8th month of pregnancy. i could pop out anytime soon (though hopefully not yet!). and the thought of staying in singapore, in our apartment all by myself really terrifies me. i got leg cramps at night and having him around really helps to help me ease the pain. doing chores also gotten easier cuz he's always there to help. but the thought that i'd be all alone for two weeks?? with noone to share things ... ?? man.. i just can't imagine that!

we finally managed to work things out *thanks to my parents*. hubby also didn't want to leave me all by myself during the last term of my pregnancy, so we requested that my parents came to company me for the whole two weeks while hubby is on business trip. though i feel bad for being so dependent to my parents, i have no other choice. at least this way, i have people around me, mom to cook for me and help ease my chores at home also. though at the same time i feel really really bad for giving them so much trouble.

i guess i've been independent for most of my life that being dependent to someone, especially my parents who've done a lot for me, is really too much. but this time, i have no choice. and i'm so grateful for the lovely parents i have.

hubby has already gone for a week and one more week to go. though mom sleeps with me (almost) every night -- just in case i have cramps or pain at night -- sensitivity really stands out during pregnancy. i couldn't really sleep well during the night and it took me longer to fall asleep every night. i don't know if it's my pregnancy (my belly is just getting heavier and heavier each day) or because my hubby is not around. either way, i can't wait till the week's over. *sigh*

:: sLesTa

>> GETTING READY

2008-02-20T21:34:00.003+07:00

sebagai anak cewek, dari gue kecil gue selalu jadi bulan2an keluarga gue dalam urusan "getting ready". maksudnya getting ready dalam hal mau bepergian gitu loh. dari yang dibilangin mandinya lama, dandannya lama, bla bla bla.. semuanya lengkap!! sementara gue sendiri sebenernya bete banget kalo mesti spend so much time to get ready. apalagi kalo pagi2 jam nya mau ngantor. kayaknya repooot gitu. duluuu, waktu masih kecil, emang yang bikin lama adalah urusan bangun dan masuk ke kamar mandi nya (namanya juga anak kecil.. malessss!). tapi semakin gede, semakin banyak yang mesti gue lakukan just to get myself ready to go out the door.

dari yang tadinya gak mesti pake make-up, sekarang paling gak make-up an dulu. blow dry rambut dulu. belom lagi kadang suka bingung mau pake baju apa. kalo maen asal ambil trus gak matching, bisa bikin gue bete seharian. kayaknya saltum gitu.. ato malah jadi ga mood ngapa2in. males ketemu orang, bawaannya jadi moody berat di kantor. susah deh jadi cewek!! urusan salah pake baju aja bisa ngaruh ke mood, coba??

kadang gue suka mikir, jadi cowok kok lebih enak sih. abis mandi, tinggal ngeringin badan, pake baju and there! ready in less than 15 minutes (counting the time in the shower). tiap hari gue selalu muter otak gimana caranya biar besok gue bisa getting ready as fast as possible.

masalahnya, udah jadi kebiasaan gue untuk put on my make-up, although it's very light and nothing compares to those make-up junkies. yang penting pake bedak, ngerapiin alis and lip gloss. but even that takes at least 5 minutes of my time. trus rambut juga gitu... mesti di blow dry, kalo gak... jadi lepek, keluar2, berantakan.. jadi bikin bad mood. ada masanya dimana gue sengaja berambut panjang, biar tinggal diiket aja. tapi gue juga mikir kesehatan rambut gue.. kalo diiket mulu jadi suka rontok. sementara kalo digerai tanpa dicuci ato di blow dry, lepek banget (derita punya rambut lurus yang halus banget!). jadi lah gue bela2in blow dry rambut dulu tiap pagi. and that takes at least 10-15 minutes of my time. lamaaaaa!!!! belom lagi kalo urusan ngantor dulu, gue selalu pengen kemeja gue terlihat rapi. jadi biasanya gue nyetrika dulu di kamar, paling gak kerahnya berdiri dengan bagus dan ga ada crease2 akibat di impit2 dalam lemari. takes time bener deh...

jangan dikira gue suka yah taking so much time just to get ready. gak suka banget. but i have to go through it, so i can have a good day. weird reasoning, eh? women!

nah, sejak gue hamil, urusan getting ready ini juga jadi faktor yang rada2 annoying buat gue. apalagi di trimester pertama. belom lagi urusan mual2 di pagi hari dan rasa malas yang makin tambah gede. pengennya tuh kadang2.. kalo bisa gue tinggal blink aja trus gue udah rapi and ready to go. sementara selama hamil kan gue juga ga bisa grasa grusu yang buru2 gitu. mesti takes time, semuanya serba pelan2 (walopun kadang2 akhirnya suka lupa!). belom lagi urusan make lotion di daerah perut, demi menghindari stretch mark. dari makein oil, stretch mark cream, lotion, semuanya deh.. itu aja kayaknya udah bikin gue kecapekan sendiri. trus awal2 sih masih mayan gampang pemilihan bajunya, tapi sekarang?? apa2 juga udah ga cocok ama gue kayaknya... secara badan udah makin menggembung gini. dandan juga sama... sampe gue balik ke jakarta lebaran kemaren motong rambut gue jadi pendek, biar gue ga terlalu repot ama urusan blow-dry. walopun tetep rutinitas itu dijalanin tiap pagi, tapi mayan cut my timing... karena rambutnya pendekan, yang penting kering, gak perlu pake di sisir per layer segala.

there were times during my first trimester that i ended up getting tired from all the time to get ready, that by the time i waited for my bus to work, i got light-headed from standing too long. sekarang sih udah mendingan, karena udah diakalin pas dandan gue duduk dan ngatur barang2 dandanan gue sedeket mungkin jadi gue ga perlu bolak balik yang menghabiskan energi gue. oh and also always make sure that i have my breakfast before i walk out the door. tapi tetep aja, everyday, i always try to get ready as little time as possible but still look made up so i can have bright day ahead.

i'm always amazed to see those women who can look so made up with their perfect hair & make-up and matching clothes from head-to-toe every day. i wonder how long does it take them to get ready? i know some of my friends would take 2-3 hours just to get ready to work, while i always want it no more than 30 minutes (including shower).. cuz more than that is just waaayyy too long for me. i just can't stand to stay in front of the mirror and get ready, but i have to cuz that's the sacrifice of being a woman. i can't help it that i want to look good everytime i go out and even though i complain about taking too long to get ready, i won't sacrifice it by looking 'kucel' when i go out. a lady should look nice, no matter what, i think. i don't need to have a full make-up and a matching outfit from head-to-toe, but enough to make me look nice and ready to take on the world.

it's hard to be a woman *sigh*. we may bring it ourselves to make it hard, maybe. i don't know. how about you? how long does it take you to get ready and prepare for a bright day ahead?

:: sLesTa

>> RECAP: VISITING HOME

2008-02-05T20:08:00.001+07:00

hey, i'm back. well, i've been back for two weeks now, but still failed to update my blog. hihihi.. i'm really slacking off these days.

my trip back was definitely fun. spent about 9 days in indonesia and managed to go to bandung for one night. the trip to bandung was long overdue. we wanted to go since our lebaran holiday but since the timing was really bad during lebaran (considering the traffic in bandung and my early pregnancy) so we never did go. even though i was actually craving for batagor kingsley so bad that i would request to everyone who went home to bandung for holiday to the dish. unfortunately, they were closed during the entire week i was in jakarta!!

so to avenge my craving, i finally managed to go to bandung to get the delicacy i've been longing since the beginning of my pregnancy and my hubby can satisfy his appetite to go to the outlets to haul all the polo shirts he needed. apparently all his clothes have gone too small for him, so he need some sets of new clothes. and eventhough singapore is known for its heaps of stores and variety of products, he still prefers to go to the factory outlets in bandung, cuz he can get more stuff with the amount of money he's willing to spend. plus the quality is not bad too.

by the time i got back to singapore, i gained 2kg!! all in one week! which is a good record, considering that i only gained 1kg in average everytime i visit my gynae, and it's between the range of 3 weeks each. so definitely, by the time i got back, i really look more like a pregnant woman. it's good, i guess.. since everyone in jakarta keeps commenting that my belly looks pretty small for a 7-month old pregnant woman, especially when they found out that i only gained 6.5kg within that 7 months.

unfortunately all that weight-gaining still doesn't mean that i'm not tired the whole time i was in jakarta. if the last time i went back, i got sick while i was in jakarta, this time, i got sick a day after i got back. i had nasal congestion, headache, sore throat, etc... and it went on for more than a week. everyone recommended that i go see my doctor, but i definitely know that my doc won't do a thing about it except for suggesting me to take full rest. but taking full rest is not something i can have in my platter. so i forced myself to go to work everyday and fell flat on my back (well, not literally, considering it's not recommended to be done by a pregnant woman) by the time i got back from work. it was a horrible week, hence my lagging in updating this blog *excuses excuses.. hihi*

anyway, i'm much much better now. i went to see my doctor last weekend, who only said, "well, no need for prescribing any drug. just take rest, your body will build resistance for it" ... see, i KNEW it!! good thing, i didn't rush to see him once i got sick, cuz that would mean, i take another leave day from work plus all the hassles to go there during weekdays. unfortunately, the visit wasn't all that happy for both me and hubby as the little one decided to move her position again and laid across my stomach. i will need to whisper to her everyday that she needs to move her head back down so i can deliver her normally when the time comes. hopefully by then, she will.

in the meantime, i'm taking off again to KL this long weekend to visit my dear brother. happy lunar year if you're celebrating... welcome to the year of the rats! :)

regards,
:: sLesTa

>> AWAY

2008-01-11T23:05:00.000+07:00

after a long busy first few weeks of the month, hubby and i decided that we should take a week off, especially since my pregnancy is young enough to still fly. so starting tomorrow, i'll be back home with my family, meeting up with my close friends. i can't wait to enjoy all the good food and spend time with my family.

i'll be gone in a week and definitely wish that time will pass by slowly while i'm back home! see you soon... and hopefully, of course, not too soon :P

rgds,
:: sLesTa

>> ALMOST COMPLETE

2008-01-02T18:37:00.001+07:00

every year for the past 30 years, another new year means new age for me. a day after everyone all over the world celebrated the new year, i celebrate my birthday. and this year is a special one as i enter the third decade of my life. 3 decades of living on this earth. gosh, i no longer can claim myself as a girl in my late twenties (which reminds me, i have to change my "about page" hehe.. )

looking back for the past 30 years of my life, i wonder if i have accomplished things that a 30-year old girl should have. i think i have. i am content with what i have done and achieved. it may not be extra-ordinary things, but given how hard i've managed to achieve them is quite a good accomplishment for me. i am happy with every one of them, though new dreams are still forming for years to come.

last nite, i was talking to a friend online. she wished me an early happy birthday since she won't be able to go online today. when i mentioned that i'm getting old with the number 3 to start my age from now on.. she said,

"but your life is almost complete as a woman. you're married to a wonderful husband, having a kid on the way, and a wonderful career. what more can you ask for?"

she's right. i couldn't ask for anything more. and this year sure is different. i don't want a big birthday party. i don't need any celebration. the fact that some of my bestfriends forgot to wish me happy birthday today, is not a big deal for me. what matter is that i'm getting the gift of life. a happy life with a wonderful husband and a life of a baby girl whom i'm about to deliver 3 months from now. and my only wish is that i would deliver my baby as smooth as possible and may she be a healthy baby girl and grow up to be a wonderful daughter.

that's all i wish for. *well, of course, a louis vuitton and a gucci bags are nice gifts too!! :)*

happy new year to everyone too! :)

cheers,
:: sLesTa

>> CONTROLLING YOUR SPENDING

2007-12-06T22:33:00.001+07:00

for those who's curious about my baby's USG scan... i apologize i won't be able to post it yet, since i didn't get my USG scan printout when i visited the doctor last week. i'm going again this weekend for the detail scan, to check every little detail about my baby and make sure that the baby is growing normally and of course, to confirm the gender. i can't wait... yaay!!

on the other hand, i want to share a bit about debt diet. this term is probably getting its popularity from the oprah show, but it's something that almost everyone has problem with these days. with the aggressiveness of those credit card offers, sometimes you just flow in and makes you become so consumptive. you buy buy buy.. and forget that by end of the month, you owe so much amount of money that your salary won't be enough to cover.

some time ago, i posted some tips on how to save money and not become too consumptive with your credit card spending in this forum. as parents-to-be, my husband and i are the perfect example of the target market to become very consumptive, especially with all the stuff we need to buy before the baby is born. though we still need to buy them.. we always need to keep in mind that savings should still be our priority. yeah of course, once a while we can splurge.. especially now during the holiday season (though i don't celebrate it).. but how much can you splurge without really breaking your bank account or your credit card limit?

here are the 5 tips i posted. i thought it might help. do you have your own tips you want to share?

1. control that shopping urge
this is one of the hardest one i think. cuz you just sometimes cannot help it that you find such a bargain product at a very nice discounted price. it's another pair of shoes you've been eyeing. the tip is, ask yourselves... do you really need another pair of shoes? will you really wear it? will it worth breaking your savings account?. most likely, after you bought it, just like the rest of your shoes collection, it will just lie there inside its box, collecting dust. sometimes, you need to learn to pass on bargain items. i know it's hard, but once you learn, you'll end up getting used to it and eventually control your shopping urge.

2. are your spending higher than your earnings?
keep track of your spending. as long as you know that your spending can be covered with your monthly earning, you're actually fine.. but, ask yourselves after you've paid all the bills... do you still have any money left? do you have extra money to buy food, occassionally go to movies, etc?. if the answer is no, then you're in trouble! it's not healthy to live your life from one earning to another. depending on your credit card so you can live by. so the tip is to get yourselves used to monitor how much spending you have charged to your credit card, plus all the bills you are liability to pay that month. then you keep track how much it is compared to what you earn. is it 10%, 20%, or 50% of your income that month? if it's still below what you earn, that go ahead, splurge, but always keep track. once it's within the limit that you need to stop. stop! again, it takes self-control to do this.. but once you get used to do it.. it'll be great. check your savings account regularly will also help to notice if your savings makes a difference every month or it is decreasing. so it gives you a warning sign about your spending habit.

3. keep track of your due dates and never pay your bill late!
okay this is purely a tip from me. it may be a bit complicated, but it's effective for me. you always keep track of your due dates to make payments for everything. loan, rent, bills, everything! so you know you're in control of your cash flow. this is my example of how to keep track my credit card.

when i was still living in the US, i purposely have no more than 4 credit cards. why only 4? well, because these four had different due dates of payment every month. it spreads that the due dates fell once every week of the month. then, everytime i use it, i monitor that i can only spend not more than $100 per month. so in total, i only have to pay $400 per month for my credit card bills. why $100 per card? well, because i am fully aware that i can only spend $400 per month on credit card payments. if i ended up buying stuff more than $400 that month, it means i'm breaking my savings account or spend less on other stuff that month. because the bill falls at every week, paying that $400 did not feel like a big liability on my part, cuz my salary came every other week, so i could manage to set aside $200 off my salary every other week.. which was only a small percentage of what i earned.

of course, this is just an example. you can always do it your way as long as you can make sure that you won't end up borrowing money at the end of the day... which means, no balance is due in the credit card. cuz having left some balance there, meaning you're borrowing money and you're paying at a very high rate of interest. it's very important to understand that before you use the card.

4. understand about the finance rate, APR or finance rate on your credit card
understand it, ask about it, request for a lower rate. get yourself involved. if you don't understand it, you won't be using it wisely. my tip is always to pay my credit card in full, so i won't have to worry about this rate. i treat my credit card like a delayed payment of something i have bought. but i never want to put myself in a position where i owe money to the bank. cuz... obviously, they charge very very high!!!

5. pay yourself first!
okay. before you go on to tips no. 1-4... you should do this the first time you get your salary. pay yourself first! meaning set aside some money for yourself. for your retirement, for your savings accounts, unit trust, mutual funds, anything that will bear fruit in the future. agree on a percentage, commit to it and do it every month. the rest of the money that's left is what you can spend for all the liabilities you have every month. never go on spending before you set aside some money in your savings account. most people do it the other way around, they spend first, and whatever's left is the amount they put in the savings account. that's totally wrong!! cuz you might end up saving NOTHING! since you've spent them all already. right?

hope my tips help. and remember... it all has to come from you. would you rather splurge on all your earnings or save some for the rainy days? you decide!

:: sLesTa

>> SO, WHAT'S NEW?

2007-11-29T22:39:00.001+07:00

oh my.. time sure flies by so fast, doesn't it? dan gak kerasa, ternyata gue udah lama banget gak update? padahal ga ada maksud untuk 'abandon' blog ini. cuma emang lagi jarang nulis aja. even though there are actually a lot of things that i should be able to write here.

so what's going on? what's new?

ok well, i guess, i should start now before it's too late. last time i posted, i was on my way home for the lebaran holiday. how was the holiday? of course, it was wonderful! ketemu ama orang tua gue, keluarga gue, ama sate padang yang udah gue idam2in dari sebulan sebelomnya... heheh.. unfortunately i was so excited to be home, i forgot my condition, which was about 14 wks pregnant at the time. so successfully, by the 3rd day, i fell sick and stayed in bed most of the day. even though i ended up getting weak & tired for the rest of the trip, it didn't stop me to go around and meet people and eat whatever i miss.

i think i ate more during that one week home than what i ate here. when i got back, my weight gained 2kgs, while i was only gaining 1kg for the first trimester. imagine that! untung gue ga hamil di jakarta.. bisa bunder beneran kayak bola kali gue ya jadinya makan mulu? heheh...

anyway, things have been quite nice now that i'm in my 2nd trimester. no more throwing ups, no more morning sickness. there are some little annoying problems here and there, but they are pretty normal during pregnancy. so i guess that's good!

well, now that my pregnancy is out in the cyber world.. i guess i have more to write about it here. i won't make this as a pregnancy diary, but at least the story would probably revolves around my pregnancy for the next 4-5 months and then (most probably) about babies afterwards. heheh... but don't worry, i won't bore you too much with them. :)

as for the layouts, i have to wait till someone can help me changing them. for now, the project is still pending. so i guess, we won't be seeing any new layouts anytime soon. hopefully i'll get it changed for my bday. who knows, someone nice might do it as a birthday present *wink wink*.

:: sLesTa

>> IDUL FITRI 1428 H

2007-10-11T21:42:00.001+07:00

wishing all of you

HAPPY EID MUBARAK
SELAMAT HARI RAYA IDUL FITRI 1428 H

Minal Aidin Wal Faidzin
Mohon Maaf Lahir & Bathin

i'm going back home to see my family *so excited* ... yaaayyy!!!

regards,
:: sLesTa

>> RE-LEARNING ENGLISH

2007-09-17T20:10:00.001+07:00

in the first few weeks i was in singapore, it was never occured to me that adjusting to the life here would be tough. i thought, it would be a breeze, especially since i've lived independently before. the thought that i will not be here totally alone, it would make it even easier for me to adapt. unfortunately, it was completely WRONG!!!

i don't know what exactly but even after three months, i still don't feel that i belong here. i guess, i overestimated myself. the adjustment period when i moved back to jakarta was easy, cuz no matter how long i've lived abroad, i'm still an indonesian. and fitting back in was just like turning my palm to another side. all the while i lived in the US, only gives me an ease to the american culture. and arrogantly as the americans, i thought that it's the culture everyone would have. i thought, WRONG, obviously!

singapore is made-up from the chinese culture. and since the country was a british colony, it has a thick historical influence from the british. combine the two together and you get... SINGLISH!!

until now, i still could not yet relate to the singlish way of speaking. not that i speak perfect english either, but my way of speaking english somehow totally oblivious compare to singlish. i would talk to people in my english and they completely wouldn't understand a word i'm saying. while i keep thinking that people speak in mandarin when i realized they were speaking in english. it's just ... weird!

here are some adjustments that i've come to realize so far:

1. CAN and CANNOT
since i learned my english in america, i tend to say 'can' or 'can't', with similar pronounciation between the two. i don't really know how to differentiate it really, but i can tell when people say can in oppose to saying can't. here, in singapore, i have to make sure that i say can or cannot, otherwise, they don't understand what i mean. since the british pronounce can't with higher 'ah'... it's rather to say it that way or say it in full term of cannot. and with singlish, you must get use to say it with 'lah' at the end of the sentence. "ok, can lah..." or "you cannot go there lah..."

2. CAPSICUM
honestly, i've never heard this word before i stepped foot to singapore. in the beginning, i didn't know what that word means at all. i thought it was a name for cheese or whatever. cuz i first saw it when i was ordering pizza. then i saw it everywhere. in pasta menu, grocery store.. and it points out to... PAPRIKA! i'm used to calling it paprika or bell pepper. but this other name, probably even the formal one, never passed by me. so it's new learning for me!

3. COLLEAGUE
now, tell me.. how do you pronouce "colleague"? well, do you know that more than 95% of singaporeans are wrongly pronouncing "colleague"? they pronounce it as "kerleague". how's that for confusion?

4. THE LETTER "H"
this is just beyond me. when i came, i used to wonder what they were talking about when they say that i should go to "hedge are". turns out they meant HR as in human resources. the way they pronounce the letter H is not as in eitch but they pronounce it as hedge. and it's common among singaporeans. so imagine when they corrected me when i didn't pronounce it "correctly" as hedge! :P

5. PLACES: BOAT QUAY, CLARKE QUAY, TAMPINES...
singaporeans have a funny way on pronounciating places. unfortunately i don't have a say in this. cuz places, especially when it's already official, should be taken as they call it, not how it should be. though it'd be just fun to mention, i think. i remember when i came, i used to wonder where the hell is boat key, i just can't find it on the map. all i can see was just boat quay. then i realized that they don't pronounce quay as "kway" but the pronounce it as "key". hence the famous "boat key", not "boat kway". :)

how about this place where my office is located? it's called "tampines". in a normal english, you'd probably pronounce it as "tem-pains", wouldn't you? unfortunately, the correct pronounciation is "tam-pee-nees".

but then again, when it comes to places, the way you pronounce it will show if you're a local or not. just like this one street in new york city.. a local will know that you would pronounce it as "hausten" instead of "yoosten" for the infamous street of "houston" in downtown new york. weird? yes. but only locals would know.

and there are more of this... i'll compile them when i learn the new 'words' again... :)

:: sLesTa

>> SORRY!

2007-09-11T11:21:00.001+07:00

well, what do you know? i failed (yet) to update my blog for a while now. not that i do it on purpose. you see, i was having problems with my computer. it just went kaput on me without me saving all the files i have in it. at first, i thought of just getting a new one.. a new macbook must be nice! :) unfortunately, i'd rather use the money for something else, particularly since i know i can still count on my mac computer... i know there's something i can do to fix it without getting a new one. so i put it up to the 'computer hospital'.

it's now fixed, but the doctors had to change the harddisk. hence, i have no data. the good news is that they were able to save it and keep the old harddisk for me, so i can always go back if i need any data from it. that's why, i couldn't yet updated the pikofdawik page also. all my pics are in the old harddisk, and i still find it hard to go back and sort them yet.

especially with all the crazy weekends i've had for the past five weeks. first, i have to go back and forth to kuala lumpur on two weekends in the row. first one was to visit my brother who insisted that my hubby and i came there that weekend. while in the meantime, i must go back again the next weekend cuz my parents are visiting. the 3rd weekend, my sister-in-law came to visit us in singapore on her stop over from srilanka for some AIDS seminar thingy she needed to attend for work. then the weekend after that, my parents are coming to stay with us for a week... which means, the week after that, my bro also joined us to bid farewell to my parents too.

what a tiring month, alright!! so i hope that's enough excuse for not posting for so long! :) i promise, i'll be back soon ... as soon as i sort things back to normal.

one thing for sure, i miss my mom already!! and i couldn't wait to go back for lebaran next month.

in the meantime, i wish to say minal aidin wal faidzin for those who's excitingly embrace ramadhan. may this ramadhan be a bless to everyone!!

happy fasting! :)

updated:
i just realized that i posted this on 9/11. six years ago i was there watching with my own eyes when the city was in silence when the towers collapsed. six years ago, i had to walk across the queensboro bridge to get home, with so much thoughts on my head. i cannot believe that it was already six years back and it still feels like it was just yesterday. and just like yesterday, i haven't felt safe since. war, natural disaster, disagreements between countries ... it just keeps on happening.

i hope for once, we stop and think. we should make this world to be a better place. say your sorrys and thank yous properly. and bring that smile to the world. i hope this ramadhan will teach people to be a better person. amen.

rgds,
:: sLesTa

>> THE NEW 'CULT' IN ASIA

2007-07-19T22:33:00.000+07:00

there's an old saying that we often heard "don't judge a book by its cover!". most of us agree and proudly say that we don't. i myself is with you. but do we do that in reality? have you ever stop to think that?

if your answer is yes, then let me ask you another question. have you ever walk and pass by a lovely young girl at the mall who's carrying a nice gucci bag and you wonder, "is that real?" ? have you gone to an interview and thought, "this guy is such a jerk for commenting on my shoes" or any other thoughts that may have gone through your mind wondering about the person you just met?

there are so many things that we do everyday, that whether we like it or not, we DO judge a book by its cover, from time to time. well, do you know that it's actually in our asian culture to do that?

you don't believe me? well, how about caste system? i'd say almost every culture in any asian societies have a caste system. those javanese have the 'nigrats' and the 'commoners'. the old generation tend to make sure that their kids marry the right person from the right caste. those indians openly have the famous caste systems in their society. the newer generations have the rich, the poor, and the so-so. those socialites, the jocks, the popular ones, the nerds, and so on and so forth. wouldn't that be judging someone just by its hereditary, not personality?

we just can't deny it that we do. we just don't do it so openly now as more and more subtle way to do them these days.

the newer generation like us, tend to look at the 'greens' as the symbol of status in the caste pyramid. yep, it's the mullah, the dollahs, the dough that gives you the power to buy and have the lifestyle that differentiate you from others. these days, it's how much you own and how you flaunt them that would put you in the different box of the new 'caste' system.

and this leads to a more consumptive generation, where we would buy different brand names (the more expensive the better) to show what kind of category we should belong to in society. and that is why asian market has become the largest target market for these brands, luxury brands (mind you!) to enter.

surprise? well, you shouldn't be. these target market is called the "cult of luxury brands"

radha chadha & paul husband has done their homework and wrote about it in their first book. the book explores how and why an amazing "luxeplosion" is rocking asia, sweeping up not just the glitzy upper crust, but secretaries toting their burberry bags, junior executives sporting rolex watches, and university students in ferragamo shoes.

hongkong boasts more gucci and hermes stores than new york or paris. china's luxury market is growing with such gusto that it will single-handedly be the biggest by 2014. even india, the new kid on the luxury block, has three-month waiting lists for hot items, while in tokyo, the epicenter of the cult, 94% of women in their 20s own a louis vuitton bag.

they did over 150 interviews with industry experts, market studies in 10 countries, and collective experience across asia. the book demonstrates how the continent's massive economic and social transformation is dismantling centuries-old ways of defining your place in society, and how your spot on today's social totem pole is marked by your chanel suit and your cartier watch.

and i do agree with them. honestly i haven't read the book yet. i just watched an interview with one of the writers, and i thought it was very interesting. i was so relieved that someone has actually took notice and wrote something about it. and based on their research, it's true that the fashion industry has targeted into the psyche of the asian luxury consumer.

in asia these days, not only the rich people who buy these luxury brand items (who would buy lots and lots of them), but more and more middle class society would own them as a symbol of status, an acceptance within their society.

it's just seem common now to see people buying louis vuitton bag (and lining up in front of the store) and see them carrying it as if it costs like a bag of peanuts. a secretary in tokyo would own 20 different hermes kelly bags or a student with bottega vinetta bag or a junior executive in a gucci shoes. it has become more and more... well, quite common but extraordinary at the same time!

are you part of the "cult"? ;)

:: sLesTa

>> FINANCIALLY INDEPENDENT

2007-07-05T21:58:00.001+07:00

lately, i'm addicted to this place. almost every minute of the hour, i would be checking what's new topics have arrived and check out those latest entries about fashion from other fashionese. i think most of the girls there are currently experiencing the same addiction.. i see them everyday logging in and getting in touch with our fashionable self and share it to others. anyway, hats off to hanzky who started this whole thing. from the first time i knew you, i know you'd be creative this way. and the fun thing is, most people logged in are people i know from waaayyy back then, so it was nice to see them again and chat in a girly conversation about hair, make-up, bags, shoes, outfits, etc... especially now we'll be in different cities.

anyway, what i wanted to talk about is not how we make ourselves girls more fashionable. but more on the financial side. you know, we girls tend to spend spend spend... maybe it's our nature or maybe because we just too greedy and we always have this urge to want it all. and those marketers know exactly our weakness and always.. i mean ALWAYS target their products to US!!

the problem is, not every girl has their own income. fortunately, for the past decades, this has changed considerably. many girls have jobs, finished the highest education available, and have their own income. on top of being a mom and a wife. and more and more moms becoming more fashionable these days.

but really, even with their own income.. how much do they really spend?

i raised this issue at the forum a couple of days back. many answers that the question just made them feel more guilty about their shopping habit. well, i didn't mean it that way. i just thought that sometimes, us girls would spend so much left and right that we completely forgot to ... SAVE!

but then, it all depends on the person itself. a lot of people don't really get the habit of savings money or even understand the idea of savings altogether. for myself, i have this habit since i was young.. well, maybe the fact that i'm from a certain place in sumatra (you know where!) had something to do with it.. but i would beg to differ. i think it's more on the way i was raised. my parents are very good at savings. it reflected on how well they provide my brother and i throughout the years. i mean, my family is not exactly coming from money, so my dad has to work hard for it. and mom made sure that we had enough to fall back on when my dad's retired. and we live comfortably. both my brother and i get to finish the highest education abroad. we have roof and accommodation that's quite comfortable.

we learn enough that the habit to appreciate what we have. saving what we earn is important. it was all in the family and we got a habit of it. well, of course, i had also a fair share to learn it the hard way. i had to live on my own and took care of my younger brother since i was in high school since dad was relocated to a different city outside of jakarta. it got me practiced to manage my family's financials while mom & dad was away. so when i was in college, all by myself, it just came natural that i thought i nailed the art of managing my own financials. i did but it wasn't easy.

being a freshman in a new country that offers free credit card to students.. i was trapped in credit card debt right away. i didn't know what APR was, what i have to do with minimum payment, or all those financial terms. it was just new to me. but i learned fast.. just when i started seeing triple zeros on my credit card bills.

i managed to pay them little by little from what i earned after i graduated. i promised myself that i need to be independent and support myself from money that i earn. i kept my promise until now. and on top of that, i also made myself make sure i first set aside my money for savings, before i use it to shop. and i think that's quite fundamental.

everyone should wonder, how much would they need to live comfortably if they retire. many would argue that we're still young, so enjoy it. think about retirement when we're 'older'. well, that's wrong! when you're young, you're at the most productive age that you would be able to earn and shop less (?) since you would only be supporting yourself. once you get married and have kids, the idea of shopping less would probably not in your vocabulary anymore. you'd need a house, a car, bigger room, tuition money, diapers, bla bla bla... you would then argue.. that's why we should earn more!

well, i think that's not quite right either. cuz i do believe that it's not how much you earn, it's how much you spend that matters. cuz what you earn and what you spend usually grows together. the more you earn, the more you spend. the more you spend, the less you save. the less you save means less money to fall back on for your retirement.

it's basic finance. well, of course, i get to learn it in college. but everyone should understand it, i think. you may argue that you should enjoy your life. buy things that makes you happy. unfortunately, i'm always grounded to believe that things should not always related to material things in life. money should not be the center of your happiness.

yep, buying branded things would make you look good. it would make you more accepted in the social scenes. it would make you look more fashionable. it would probably make you happy to wear it. but come the time when you are no longer able to earn money, would you have enough money in your bank account and reaps the fruits of your hardwork? think about it! would you be happy then?

well, i may be suggesting to the extreme here. but i just want to share it to (probably) get you to open your eyes. cuz i see too many young people now are too consumptive.. in their mind, they think... buy buy buy!! cuz my parents couldn't afford to buy them for me. but at the end, they have nothing to be proud of, but these designer bags & shoes that would probably devaluated over time.

my suggestion is to enjoy life but also balance it out with saving up for the rainy days. it doesn't have to be much. to save around 10-15% of your income should be enough, for starters. at least it gives you the habit of disciplining yourself to be more responsible with your money. once you earn it, put it away, thought of it as lost money. after you have quite plenty, put it on investments and let them work for you. putting away 10-15% of your income is quite small, don't you think? you still get the 90-85% to buy anything you want. to pay for rent, utilities, food, and .. shopping!!

some may say that, well.. what i earn still wouldn't be enough for me to save. well, look at your spending! are you spending more than what you earn? if yes, then you gotta adust your spending.. cuz adjusting your earning would only mean that you (psychologically) think you get to spend more. at the end, you'll be back to square one.

there are a few lucky ones who has family money to support their lifestyle. hey i don't condemn you. you guys are lucky if that's true!! but not everyone is so lucky. even if my parents could still afford to buy me things, i'd rather that they don't. cuz at the end.. everybody should look forward to the goal of.. FINANCIALLY INDEPENDENT!

i've been working toward that goal since i earned my own income. now that i have my own family, it's only common sense that we should. wouldn't you?

rgds,
:: sLesTa

>> BACK TO WORK

2007-06-28T20:19:00.000+07:00

after two days with 'unemployed and full-time housewife' status, i finally went back to work yesterday. honestly, it's quite a deja vu for me and i feel excited all over again as if this was my first job. although i'll be working at the same affiliate with the place i work for in jakarta, i won't be doing the same thing.. so it's totally new. and i have totally mixed feelings about everything. about the work, the job i'll be doing, the working environment, the co-workers, and the boss. i was having such a great time at the last place, that i don't think it's easy to find any other working environment like that ever again. but life must go on... and to move forward, we must adapt to changes in our lives.

after two-and-a-half years working in jakarta, i was actually getting comfortable with the working condition. yeah, the commute sucks, but i have a driver. yeah, the city is too hectic and too polluted, but i live with my parents and have maids! yeah, the working hour is very very late, especially because most of the time i have to be stuck in the traffic jam... but at least, all i have to do is just get home and food, clean sheets, clean clothes are already being taken care of. no wonder, people just won't leave indonesia... life is too good with all the maids and drivers and gardeners who would do your dirty jobs. all you gotta to do is just sit and relax and tell them what you need to make it through the day.

in the beginning, i didn't find them a plus. especially after almost 10 years being on my own, i'm used to do everything myself. but just as i get a comfort of having everything served under my nose, i have to pack my bags and move and start doing everything myself. though, i have no complains... it's a trade off that i'm willing to take anytime. i'm not a spoiled brat in the first place. but it does need some adjustments on my part.. and it turns out quite hard to do, ironically even after only 2 years in jakarta...

1st day at work
my apartment is only 15 minutes away from work. so this is totally a big change from a normal one-hour commute i have to do in jakarta. it gives me more time to sleep in the morning. but little did i know.. the travelling to work thing is harder than i thought. first, i have to take public transportation, which i don't have any problem with actually.. since i'm used to do it back when i was in nyc. walking is my thing.. so i don't mind. BUT.. what i don't take consideration is that singapore's weather is literally just like jakarta. it's hot hot hot!! and humid too! if in jakarta i hardly get a feel of the hot weather & humidity (hey, we got out of an air-conditioned room to an air-conditioned car then off to an air-conditioned office!), its totally different here. so here i am in business outfit and high heels, walk through the hot & humid weather from the apartment building to the nearest MRT station... and i was literally drenched in sweat by the time i got to the station. since my train ride to work is a short one.. by the time i got to the MRT station near work, the air-conditioned train didn't take all my sweats away, so i'd be literally wet with sweat by the time i got in to work. and those high heels?? whoa, forget about it. the long walk is not good with heels. i used to wear sandals and sneakers to work when i was in nyc.. something that is impossible to do at work now. so i gotta get used to wear them.. or carry them in my bag while i go to work in my flip flops and switched them when i got to the office. anyways, i gotta figure something out...

so, the first day was a workout in itself. but of course, i managed to get in on time (in sweat!)... just to find out that my boss forgot to inform her team that i'm coming! so, noone knows what to do with me.. and i was left alone until lunch time, well, doing nothing!!! good thing is, everybody was nice and helpful. they even invited my for lunch and show me around. so at least, i feel welcome already. i guess it's the asian thing... i wouldn't have to worry about people being too individualistic here.. though i hear the competition is tough. but i think i can manage that :)

2nd day at work
i got smarter! my co-worker told me that i should just take the bus and avoid the long walk to and from work. and i was like... yeah, why didn't i think of that! the thing is, i never like a bus ride, cuz they usually take a while.. through traffic and all. but i realized, my route is actually against the traffic, so i should be fine. after a long search of information about the bus line.. i found out that there is a bus that stops right in front of my apartment and stops right in front of my office building. so i tried it today. the travelling time is pretty much the same with my taking the MRT. but it's minus the long walk, so i can keep my heels without switching it to sandals.. and i don't have to arrive at work drenched in sweats due to the long walk under the hot & humid weather. so it's good! i'm liking it already!

as for the workload, i'm starting to get the handover training and my boss starts giving me stuff to do, which is good... cuz i can't stand to do nothing. already, i left work after 7pm today.. and she's already asking me if i can come in on saturday too. whoa, slow down lady... i still need to settle down first! it's only my first week, for godssakes!

i think i'd say no to her this time. i'm not one who turn down job actually, but this time, my goal in life is different. i have a family of my own that i need to take care of, even though it's only the two of us now.

going back to work is always exciting.. the first few weeks are usually the hardest, not only for the adjustments, but from my past experience with my office in jakarta, getting settled with all the access to systems, computers, emails.. may take a while. and it's quite a pain the neck. the good thing is, i've done it before.. plus people here are helpful and nice. that's all i can ask for, and it's all good .. for now! *crossing my fingers tight*

ps: happy birthday, mom! i hope my good news is a good enough gift for you... luv u!

cheers!
:: sLesTa

>> CURRENTLY UNEMPLOYED

2007-06-25T13:37:00.000+07:00

8 YEARS AGO

different kinds of people, races, languages mixed during rush hour inside subway trains to the city. people walked by so fast to get the wherever their destinations were. smells of hot soft pretzels, kebabs, roasted nuts filled up the air. starbucks at your service, literally almost at every corner of the block. then there was me... fresh out of college and looking forward to my full time job in a city that never sleeps. weekends are about concerts, soho trips, coffee shops, trying out new restaurants. it was full of life, freedom of singlehood

that was manhattan. the city i loved and always will be... the city that i had to leave two and half years ago

2 YEARS AGO

i got up early in the morning just to beat out the traffic, racing with sunrise. got in to work real early just to make sure i wouldn't be late, even for one minute, cuz blaming traffic is just such a lame excuse. i grew accustom to stay at the office as late as possible, so that i don't have to wait in traffic on my way back home. an hour commuting was considered... normal!. my weekend was about family occasions or rest at home all day.. sleeping or watching dvds. on my vacation, i just can't get out of the city and relax on a nearby beach resort.

jakarta. that's where my family stays. a city that's so hectic, my life seems to pass by so fast with hardly anything can be done as i wish.. i came back for only two-and-a-half-years.. but it seems like only in a blink of an eye.

TODAY

i am unpacking my bags. i just moved, again.
to a different city, entirely different country.
new name, new status, new life, new apartment, new bed, new microwave, all new...
in two days, i'll start work at the office, with a new position and new job description that is totally brand new to me.
it's a challenge alright.... and i'm doing all over again.

singapore. it's the third country and the tenth city i live in. the city that i start my new life with hubby. a city that i'll be spending my life for the next two, five, ten years... who knows?

but for these two days... i'm enjoying my temporary status as an unemployed and full-time housewife *ha!*

all pics were taken by sLesTa

rgds,
:: sLesTa